Q and A!

You ask and I answer! If you have a question please leave a comment and I will answer them in my next post!

Blessings to you!

Jean

Girl Time

This past week we had a SPECIAL treat. A very sweet friend from my church youth group days came to visit. I love this special gal. We super close buddies during our teenage years, then we went our separate ways but we have always kept up our friendship. It seems so easy and natural to pick up where we left off in a past visit. She is a loyal friend that I count as a true blessing to me. I am SO grateful that she came to see us. I anticipated her visit from the moment I found out she was coming.

The girls adored her. She totally loved on them too.

I also got to see my BFF this past Friday too. She was in a nearby city and we met for lunch. It was a great blessing to steal away some moments with her. She has just finished her surgery rotation in medical school. She is an amazing woman. Unfortunately I didn't take any pictures. After she headed home, the girls and I headed out to do some shopping. Our first stop was Trader Joe's. I have been hearing all about this awesome grocery store but hadn't been able to get to one until Friday! I am in love. I will definitely be swinging by anytime I am near one. I super impressed with the prices and the quality of ingredients in most of the foods that I looked at. I didn't see any high fructose corn syrup or partially hydrogenated oils on any ingredient lists. Impressive!

I also took the girls to toy Heaven...Toys 'R Us. Peanut had a ball telling me what she wanted and did very well when I reminded her we were not there to buy just to look. I was able to sneak a couple of things in the cart for her birthday. We also visited a mall and had fun window shopping before heading home. It was a fun day with my girls. I love spending time with them like that.

Now...are you having a bad day? Do you need to smile or maybe even chuckle? Well I have a picture that may help. To see it in real life brings a giggle out of me every time she does it. Hope it brightens your day.

-Mama

Dr Appts, Playgroup and Church!

We had our playgroup today (FCC- families with children from China) and the girls had a great time! It was so nice for all of us to be with these wonderful families! It was interesting that the girls did so much better with other adoptive families than at a park with children playing. They just fit right in regardless of the language barrier and played! Some of the kids knew some Chinese and they tried it out on Emma and Ellie! One of the families will be traveling in September for their baby- they waited 4.5 years for her. We are so excited to welcome our youngest member to the group soon!! Another family will travel in August for their 13 yr old daughter! I love that our group is still growing!

The girls received a few gifts and they even had a princess cake made for them (thank you Michelle and Zhou)! It was delicious! They were thrilled and it was obvious how much they enjoyed the afternoon!

After that we went to Emma and Ellie's Dr appt. Early this week they went with Anna and Sarah to their appt, so they could see what it was like. They had blood drawn and did surprisingly well. They also had the left hand x-rayed for bone age. I am interested in what the results are and this next week we go to the dentist- I am looking forward to her input, too.

I think the girls are 7 and 8 yrs old. Ellie thinks she is 7 and Emma thinks she is 10. Then 5 minutes later Emma said she was 9? I know 10 is not right- we will see if it is going to be 8 or 9 for little Emma. When we figure it all out we will let you know when their birthdays will be!

We are going to have Emma do physical therapy. She has weaker muscle tone and she is more rigid. There is a chance she may have a tethered cord (I have no experience with that )- so we are going to a specialist to check it out. Nothing was in her medical report but she has something at the base of her spine that is questionable.

I need to remember to keep my expectations low and give the girls time to adjust. I tend to want to jump right into life! The girls have so many things they are adjusting to- we just need to take our time. We have only been home one week now.

We went to church with all 4 girls- a first. Arrived late, sat in the back ready to leave if needed. The only one that had a hard time was Anna (not a surprise)! Emma and Ellie sat perfectly and quietly, we were shocked! I have already scheduled their baptism for mid August- I want them to be familiar with our church so it's not a complete shocker. They are doing it after the service- whew! I am tired of audiences so we're glad it will be kind of private. We were stared at every moment in China. Now tonight we ate at our favorite Chinese restaurant and had an audience their too. They mean well and are so nice to us but we hoping for a quiet dinner as a family. They talked to girls and gave them some instructions from us- like don't wake your sisters up in the morning, don't pick your scab, chew your food before you put more in your mouth, don't pick food up off the floor and put it in your mouth - you know all that really important stuff that mom's want to tell their kids!

Feeling Blessed and Thankful!!

Home for 5 days!

This pic was taken before the accident. After this we told her to put her helmet on and then tried to help her get it on. I had to post it because she looks so cute on her bike and has worked so hard to pedal!

Everyone loves big bro Mark! He is tons of fun- he's just like Grandpa Boppa!

Mark was going to trim his hair he didn't realize it was set at the shortest setting- he ended up needing to redo his whole head! Oh well- at his age it will all grow back!!

More fun outside!

Big girl little bike!

Anna decided to wash her toys in the doggies water dish. She was so cute about it I decided to take a pic! You know how slimy doggy water dishes can be - yuck honey!

One of the toys from China got stuck on the ceiling! Big bro Johnny to the rescue!

The girls love playing with their dolls!! I love seeing them play with their dolls!

We lost our internet connection for a little while- oh my- I could hardly stand it! Thank goodness it is up and running now!

Ellie is doing great. Her bump has turned into a bruise but is healing nicely!

I am happy to say everything is moving along just fine! The girls are adjusting well and getting comfortable in their new home! Emma particularly likes being home. She loves playing with dolls and doll accessories. It is really quite cute! She is so much more peaceful at home. She is responding well to love and positive reinforcement. We still occasionally have to tell her NO but she is listening to it now- PTL!! I can tell by the look on her face she want to be a good girl and doesn't like to have no said to her. When we first got her the expressions on her face did not match her feelings- now they do. It actually concerned us in China so it is so good to see them correlate now!

I think it even surprises Ellie that Emma is behaving. She was always the favored child so this is a change for her, too. It will take her a while to get used to it and to understand both can be good- there doesn't have to be a bad and a good.

Today we actually got up before the girls!! This was a minor victory! Usually they pounce on us early in the morning. It feels so good to have baby steps in the right direction!

Ellie is not so happy with her new Momma's cooking or lack there of! Emma is eating up the American food but Ellie is not so fond of it. We try to have Chinese every other night (yea, take out) and order extra rice for another meal but other than that they are being fully immersed in our way of life. All in all it is going well and I think they are happy and settling in nicely!

The language is coming slowly- slower than I remember with Sarah but it is happening. We are working on the colors, the siblings names, counting to 10, please, thank you and okay Mom!

I had signed the girls up for a park playgroup when we thought they would be home in early June. We went to it this week and gave it a try. It was a challenging environment for Emma and Ellie. They were unable to follow the directions due to the language issue. Most of the equipment is new to them and they just don't have the muscle development to do what the other kids can do. Soon they will grow in coordination and ability but they just don't have it yet. That is one of the many aspects of adopting older that we love- the transformation!! More on that topic at a later date!

Just in case you are interested- I had my hair highlighted today- no bugs- I'm in the clear- thank goodness!

Thank You Jesus for each day as a family of 11!!

Incognito

We're going undercover for a bit.

Watch out spy world....here comes Agent Peanut,

Agent Mama,

Agent Daddy,

and of course, Agent Pumpkin!

We're off to break codes and solve mysteries!

An Evening in the ER

We were all outside playing, riding bikes, scooters and getting wagon rides with big bro MArk. This was the first time he met his new sisters so everyone was excited! Ellie loves riding her bike and she is actually working hard to pedal it!

This time she got on it with out her helmet. Right away I let her know she needed to get it on. She smiled and shook her head no. I insisted and Mark walked over to her to help her put it on. She refused, shook her head no again, giggled and started to get silly. Then fell over on her bike and hit her cheek bone on the driveway. She seemed stunned and had a far away look in her eye. I thought she was holding back the tears but no realized she probably knocked herself out for a moment.

Little tears ran down her cheeks but it wasn't a full out cry. I comforted her- trying to show her that's what Mom's do and hoping to make her feel better. It didn't have much impact and she still had a far away look in her eyes. We decided that was enough of the outdoor play and we all went inside for snack. Ellie had a couple bites and then wanted to go to sleep. She had her head on the counter and refused any more food. Before I knew it she had slipped out of the kitchen.

We hadn't seen mark in 3 weeks and I was busy planning dinner so I didn't really notice for awhile. The girls told me she had gone to bed. We are all still jet lagged but that is not normal for her. Still I figured she was just tired and was upset about falling- maybe it all just exhausted her.

The girls tried waking her up- she didn't want to get up. When dinner was ready we carried her down and set her at the table- she seems to always wake up for meals but not this time. She just couldn't wake up, if she did her eyes would soon shut again. Again we still didn't put the pieces of the puzzle together. We thought it was a bad case of jet lag along with just not liking the food.

A couple minutes later she threw up. That's when it occurred to me- okay, something is going on. This is more thsn jet lag. We got her cleaned up and ready to go to the Doctor. She threw up again- okay skip the Dr's office we are going to the ER. Then she threw up a third time, skip the ER- we are calling 911.

Two police cars came with sirens, then an ambulance, with sirens. Ellie was still looking dazed, had an occasional little tear and continued to nod off. I went with her in the ambulance- she continued to act that way. Her vitals were okay but she worried the paramedics. We ended up going to the children's hospital with full sirens. (I wanted to pull out my phone and text you all for prayers but there wasn't time)

We were met with a complete medical team prepared to care for her. They were wonderful and I was so thankful. They did a CAT scan- she was perfect and was very still. It looked just fine PTL! They had a translator come but Ellie didn't speak- just shook her head yes and no to answer the questions. They decided she has a concussion and we were sent home 3 hours later.

She has a headache now and I have given her motr*n (per Dr's orders). She did not eat BKF and is resting again. I am still concerned for her. Please pray that she is feeling better soon and her headache is just a headache and nothing more.

Thank you! God Bless You!

Reconnecting

We have been busy, busy seeing friends and family lately. Last week we had two sweet friends from Russia here. Mr. Russia is actually a college friend of ours who has been in Russia as a missionary for about 6 years. A few years back he met a sweet girl, fell in love and married her one year ago this past April. Due to the slight distance between our families we had not gotten to meet this sweet girl until their visit last week, although we are most certainly Facebook Buddies.

It was a delightful time of catching up with and getting to know each other. The girls simply adored having friends over who actually spent the night! (That meant Mommy and Daddy slept in their room too!)

Over the weekend we headed to Daddy's family reunion. It was exceedingly hot so the kids really enjoyed swimming. Peanut is a fish, I tell you! She would have spent the entire time in the water instead of just 90% of the time. Unfortunately I do not have any pictures of our day because I may have forgotten my camera battery at home! Oops! (As a Mommy blogger I was devastated!) It was a 4 hour ride home and for 70% of the trip we heard in a sad little voice, "But I just wanted to stay and spend the night," from Peanut! Then a crazy lightening storm filled the sky and she buried her face in her pillow and fell asleep.

On Sunday we got to see our friends who are missionaries in the Solomon Islands. They just returned to the states this past week and are here for a few months. The Hubby's parents live very near to where we are now so we met up with them for the afternoon and evening. Our kids had a ball playing together on the farm that he grew up on. They climbed in and out of tractors, rode toy tractors, took Gator rides, and ate a superb supper....and to top it all off, sweet fellowship and catching up after a year apart!

Pumpkin now has Hand, Foot, Mouth again. Ugh! She has it worse than this past spring. So far Peanut doesn't have it so we are hoping she will skate through.

We have another good friend from California coming to see us for a couple days this week. We are also preparing for Peanut's 4th birthday which is just over a week away! I can not believe it. She is extremely excited. It has been so fun to see the excitement building in her and to know that she really gets that her birthday is coming.

Pumpkin is keeping us on our toes. This is what I found the other day upon walking into the kitchen.

She had climbed up on the chair, found the Cheerio box, opened it, decided to have a snack and dumped the entire contents (it was only half full) out on the table, floor and chair.

She has now figured out that if she gets her sister's stool she can get into more things. She goes to find the stool, carries it to the spot she wants, climbs it and "Waa-Laa" she can get into things she isn't supposed to get into! Smartie pants!!!!!

Guess Who's Speaking Chinese...

You got it- it's Sarah. She didn't say hardly a word in China but once we got her home she is jabbering away with the girls. It is usually helpful BUT not always.

This morning I asked her what she said to the girls... She told me that she said- "It's 8 o'clock".

I looked at her and said ahhh, It's not 8:00... it's 5:30... 5:30am...

yea I know she said...

Okay let's clarify this, if you talk to them you have to tell them true things not just whatever sentence you can say... (while giving her a firm look)

Okay (reluctantly said)...

She can only say simple sentences but it is fun for them to chatter.

There is a part of me that wants to say excuse me... this is english immersion! Sarah did go back to calling them their Chinese names and we had to correct her.

Yesterday we went to a park- it was a half hearted effort to keep everyone awake! The girls had never been on a swing before. Again the shouted with glee! Ellie fell off but she gets right back up again and tries harder!

They also tried bike riding and skinned their elbows. Hubby put on bandaids- princess bandaids - another first! (I was already in bed)

Okay it's now 7:23- I ate bkf already but I'm ready for a second one! I don't do well with jet lag... We are all exhausted. Can't wait for things to get back on track!

(I'll post pics when I get a chance!)

Home Sweet Home! What we found out in China!

Leaving the White Swan!

New faces at our kitchen counter!!

Look at Emma's smile- that is a for real smile!! She loves to dress up and loves that doll she found in our house! They both love the dress up shoes!!

Everyones happy we are home!!

It feels so good to be home! Thank You Jesus!! I am so grateful that our travels were uneventful. It was exhausting but we made it!! The girls were giddy to be home! They both ran and hugged their Ge ge- Johnny!! We were surprised they were so affectionate to him. He was genuinely excited to meet them and show them their new home. After about 4 hours- he was getting tired of all the activity- that is understandable. We are going to move a few things around so that the older kids can have the basement and the younger kids can have all of their toys upstairs. Everybody need s little space to retreat too!! My shower and the computer are my two spots!

The girls are loving our toys- nothing new just stuff from Sarah and Anna, but to them it's all new! I like seeing it get used and so much joy coming from their playing!! Emma and Ellie are really into dress up!! They can't get enough of it- it is so cute. We have seen some wonderful natural smiles from Emma- which is good!! The dear girl had no idea how to deliberately smile - like for a pic! She needs more mirror time!!

Sorry to leave you hanging but I have had to think about this for awhile because I don't know what it means, or what to think.

When we were in China we found out that our girls have another sister. It is so wonderful to know that... I mean - I have often wondered about Sarah and Anna- do they have birth siblings in China or are they adopted somewhere. We love them so much we would want to give their siblings a home too if it could work out!

In this case we have heard that the little sister still lives with the parents. That's good... the children should live with their birth parents, if they can. Isn't that what we all want? I mean of course it is, but it does bring about confusing feelings and then twists the whole adoption thought process. I had to think this through a bit because my first thought was maybe we could adopt her, too! HOLD IT, she is where she should be- with her birth family. What am I thinking? She is not an orphan, she has a home. She is right where she is supposed to be.

Then I started thinking- oh my- of course most of our children have siblings- we just don't know who they are? That thought drives me crazy- it's a puzzle that can never be solved.

What are your thoughts?

(I'll add a few pics when I find my camera!)

Swearing In and Preparing for Our Journey Home!

Our version of the red couch picture!

All of our daughters!

One happy Momma with her girls!

After the swearing in ceremony, in front of the consulate!

Big Sissy and her two new sisters!

We were blessed to have such a wonderful family with us in GZ!! The Holts were in China in 2005 and now the returned for a little sister! They kept us laughing!

Today was the swearing in... it has been an incredible journey but now it is winding down. Tomorrow we get the girls passports and visas and head to HK for the night. We will fly home early Saturday morning and arrive home Saturday afternoon- I love that about this trip- we get two Saturdays!!

There are more posts to post, pics to see and experiences to tell about but for now we are focused on our journey home. God has blessed us with our daughters and sons. How lucky we are to parent this crew!

I have mentioned before that our dear Emma is a challenge. She has so, so much to learn. We are putting our faith in God that he will help us every step of the way. Hubby has been the one to deal with her misbehaviors. Once we get home it will be just me and the girls- Please pray for wisdom and patience for me as I deal with the challenges of two new daughters throughout the day. I do not doubt for a moment that God can do it but I do doubt whether or not I can do it- so as long as he is in control we will be fine!

Today we had the girls sit down with our family, our guide and the person in charge of the guides. We discussed expected behavior in America (seatbelt, stay with your family, etc). We discussed family expectations- respect older brothers, respect parents, respect our home, listen to parents, the parents are in charge, all children in America either go to school or are taught at home... it's the law, etc!

In all honesty - they made it very clear that if she(Emma) wanted to be in our family this is what she needed to do. We were glad they did! We know that kids are defiant at times, we know they test the limits and challenge the rules, we know they want control, we know that everyone makes mistakes. We are a happy family, we treat each other nicely, we love each other, we respect each other, we help each other and we believe we can be a great family to our new daughters but they need to work hard to make it work out. We believe they heard that message and now we will all move forward.

It was interesting because Emma then behaved perfectly and Ellie acted up. There are interesting dynamics when adopting bio sibs! I am sure this will not be the last time they act as a tag team. For too long they have been labeled good and bad. It is my goal, my mission to stop that. We used it a little to encourage better behavior from Emma while in China but that is not a game to be played at home.

I want... I dream for both girls to feel for once equally loved, equally treasured, equally admired and equally respected. This is not a task I can do on my own- this is so much bigger than me. It has to be all God, and only God.

Please pray that all goes as well as possible on our journey home!

Please pray for our journey as we become a family of 11 (2 parents and 9 children)!

Truly the Lord knows my heart! He knows my dreams! I am so grateful to him! He knows that as a child I played "big family"! My family had 13 in it so stay tuned!!

There is some other interesting news but I will wait to share it. It's all up to God and I completely submit to him!

Meeting the Foster Parents!!

This has been one of the most amazing experiences I have ever been through... I am so thankful to God for allowing all of this to happen.

I really can't believe we met the foster family!

I can't believe we were in the home that our daughters lived in for the last 3.5 years.

I just can't believe that the woman we saw in pictures with our daughter is now in pictures with us, with our family. It is truly a blessing!

Here are pictures of all her foster children throughout the years! Ladies, if you think it doesn't make any difference whether or not you send an update on your child to the foster family - you are wrong! Send them! The marvel over the children! It is what they do, it's their job and they love to see the children thriving! (If possible send directly to the foster parents so they are sure to get them!)

Most of the foster families live in these complexes near the orphanage and the school.

They invited us into their home and had fruit and water for us! She also had a few things cooking in the kitchen that she sent with us for the girls.

The relationship between our girls and the foster family was not lovey dovey. Their was love there but not much hugging and kissing. The foster Dad worked a lot and the girls were mostly with the foster Mom.

Here is the school the girls attended. It was nice and close to home.

We asked many questions and got straight forward answers. I would have preferred that the girls not be there during that time but we did not have any options.

Anna made herself right at home!

It saddened me that she did not have many good things to say about Emma. I think she did say that Emma like to clean up and be helpful... but that was all.

Once Emma found out she was going to be adopted she she frequently misbehaved. She was kicked out of school 5 times in the last 2 months.

At that point she decided that no one was going to control her. We have had to be very strict with her while in China. At first I think some of the people think we are excessively firm but once they see how she acts- I think we have gained their respect. Either way - it doesn't matter... Emma is our daughter, she is part of our family and she needs to fit into our family... we don't need to fit into what she desires. She WILL learn, it will just take some time.

Their is the foster Dad having a cigarette. To me this picture is so thought provoking. It is so simple and yet there is so much depth in it...

This is the bedroom the girls shared. They slept in the same bed. We asked them if the wanted to sleep together in the hotel and at home. Ellie was a definite NO!

Here is her kitchen. It is so simple but the truth is I am sure she is a much better cook than I am and I have a large kitchen...

My girls are going to be disappointed in their new mothers cooking...

Thank You for caring for our daughters for the last 3.5 years!

With the way Emma acted we wondered what the foster family was really like... We were thankful to know they were nice people. We liked them right away, there was an unspoken bond between us... They have 2 birth children in their 20's. A daughter who is married and has their grandson. Their bio son is in college.

She has fostered for many years but will no longer be fostering. Emma and Ellie were her last foster children. We so appreciate the care they gave our daughters but sometimes people do "burn out". It was evident that our Emma was not the favored daughter. She is a "hurt" child. She is need of love, guidance and she will need time to heal.

This is the parents bedroom.

Another pic of the school.

We new of a couple children that were adopted from this orphanage and were our daughters friends. They new Meiying!! Everyone loved her- she was a good girl!!

They also new Sha Sha! The girls were so excited to see her!!

She will be getting her forever family in September (about)!

I know that Ellie had many friends but it was nice to know that Sha Sha was also Emma's friend.

Adorable!! PTL- they all have or will have forever families!

The experience was surreal! We almost backed out- we just weren't sure how it was going to affect the girls. It turned out to the the best thing for all of us! We have never had this opportunity before- I am so thankful for it!

We did not get to visit the orphanage. We were okay with that, especially since our girls were only there for a short time.

I love this Grandma!! She was thrilled to see the girls! She was all smiles and very few teeth!!

While we were there one of the families got an update on one of the previous foster kids! Everyone was so happy to see the pics! They marveled over how good the child looked and how much she had grown!!

Everyone crowded around!

I was surprised that the girls stuck close to us and did not cuddle up to the foster Mom. They loved going back and visiting and eating her food but they did not hug, kiss or cling to her.

Maybe she prepared them well for their adoption or maybe it just wasn't a super close relationship.

It is time to leave, they are all walking us back to our bus.

You can see in the window Emma on the left, Ellie in the middle and Sarah on the right.

I felt very sad leaving. I got teary along with the foster Mom. I know the girls felt sad inside but they did not cry or cling to them. As a child I know that I would have been clinging and whaling.

There is Ellie waving at her foster Dad and absorbing the moment.

They asked that the girls never forget where they are from and someday come back to visit.

I am so thankful that Katie captured these moments...

Hands touching hands through the glass window. It is such a tender moment...

It takes courage to do what these foster families do and it takes incredible courage to do what the these children have to do...

Our wordless Wednesday picture...

Still talking! Woman are so alike where ever they are from!

Everyone's Grandma saying good bye to the girls!

Sarah taking it all in...

The girls came up to the front of the bus for their last good byes.

They were sad but the held up just fine- they did not cry.

I think it was hard for the foster family to say goodbye.

The orphanage- Guilin SWI

We did not get to go inside. Our daughters were only there for 9 months.

Today is such a turning point in the lives of our daughters. We are so thankful for this opportunity to love and raise our girls.

Thank You Jesus!